Check out this booklet I wrote. It’s designed to explain the Christian faith in a way that a secularist can appreciate. It’s in QuickTime format. Just click on the illustration to advance to the next slide. Please me know what you think. Blessings.
The Multi-Generational Church
Jeff Hughes has written an insightful article, expressing his thoughts on the multi-generational church. He understands the desire of young adults to start their own congregations. He relates to twenty and thirty-somethings who have felt that their voices were not being heard by the leaders of their established churches. Yet he warns that young adults give up a lot when they separate.
When “emerging generations” isolate themselves from the rest of the church, they are ignoring some of their own fundamental values, such as community and diversity. I believe that a true “emerging” church is a multi-generational community composed of people of all ages who desire to worship God in authentic ways.–Jeff Hughes
Jeff suggests a “tri-generational” church as an alternative to separate churches for different generations. His model proposes multiple worship venues, each served by its own leadership team. The teams are accountable to a senior leadership core. Beyond this Jeff encourages a culture that fosters respect for different generational viewpoints, allows for diversity in expression, and strives for unity by developing terminology for resolving conflict.
As a middle-aged guy, I resonate with Jeff’s heart. I would like to see more dynamic, growing, multi-generational churches. I sense the incompleteness, sometimes even to the point of grief, when I walk into a church that is defined by one generation. Yet I also understand how difficult it can be to foster unity in a congregation where multiple generations are striving to express their devotion to God in their own heart languages.
I’ve on occasion worshiped with traditional churches that were made up primarily of senior adults. I’ve been deeply blessed, seeing people sing familiar hymns, expressing their love for God colored by many lifetimes of experiences of the faithfulness of God. I’ve seen tears in the eyes of elderly women as they sang Amazing Grace, because they knew from experience what the words meant. I miss that. I’ve also known older adults who canonized the old hymns and refused to acknowledge that God is working through modern forms of worship. I’ve seen buildings and organs turned into idols and heard drums condemned as desecrating the sanctuary. In some cases, older adults are simply repeating what they’ve been taught. In other cases, their enshrinement of tradition betrays them as very religious people who lack authentic, gospel-centered faith.
I’ve worshiped with so-called “Gen-X” churches and found the experiences to be powerful. It was energizing to see young adults express their passion for God with deep reverence and loud music. There were signs of extraordinary creativity that we have not seen in traditional churches for decades. There were marks of authenticity, a sense that the worshipers were truly sold out to Jesus, serious about their mission, and deeply committed to one another. Yet often I felt alone in the midst of these churches. Their sanctuaries were dimly lit and few people took initiative to speak to me. Their leaders, many of whom projected rock-star personae, didn’t seem genuinely interested in persons outside their inner circles. Yet their personae projected cultures that attracted people none the less. Some of these churches are experiencing explosive growth.
At times I’ve thought it would be a mistake to hamper young churches with the burden of becoming multi-generational. It takes a lot of time and energy to facilitate constructive communication and build high-trust relationships between the generations. I’ve wondered if meeting that burden would drain too much momentum from these young, fast-moving congregations. Deep in my heart, however, is the conviction that the generations need each other.
When I was a young pastor, my growing, new church had a handful of middle-aged members. They were valuable encouragers, cheerleaders mostly, careful not to meddle too much. They accommodated for my insecurities. They understood the burden I was carrying and chose not to pile on when I failed. These people were extraordinary; I wished I had a hundred of them. It has taken me years to realize just how extraordinary they were. In many ways my church was hostile to middle-aged adults. At that time, I understood very little about the challenges of midlife. I judged the middle-aged harshly when they didn’t live up to my idealized vision of what midlife would be. I misunderstood their language and misinterpreted their intentions when they tried to help. If I had taken more time to know them, I’m sure I could have avoided some needless conflict and gained valuable allies in advancing the mission of our church.
Facilitating strong, interdependent relationships between the generations is hard and takes time. Not only do we have different stylistic preferences, we also have psychological filters that distort our views of one another. I once had a conversation with a young pastor, whose church I had visited. He told me that he sensed that I didn’t know what I was looking for. He suggested that I wouldn’t be satisfied in any church until I defined what I was seeking. He maintained that he had a prophetic gift that allowed him to see this in me. We continued the conversation politely though it seemed like for him the real discussion was over. He had defined me. From my chair, our conversation seemed archetypal: young idealism meets middle-aged ambiguity. Later in the week I emailed him but did not receive a response. He was an interesting guy; I would have liked to get to know him better. But the reality was that he served a blowing-going, young church. He didn’t have time for me.
Multi-generational churches at their best are stronger, more resilient, and more authentic expressions of the Kingdom of God than single generation churches. Yet they will not be built without a cost. Establishing the DNA for these churches will require more foundational work that could slow early momentum in young congregations. The generations will have to make time for one another. We’ll need to develop new team-building skills so we can leverage the strengths of multi-generational leadership to gain long-term vibrancy. We’ll need to embrace new leadership models that are less dependent on generational personae and more grounded in spiritual maturity. We’ll need to teach our people to be less egocentric about their generational preferences and more appreciative of worship that is authentic yet different. Ultimately, our commitment to become multi-generational will have a purifying effect on the church. It will be the extravagant love of Christ and His people that compels the lost to come to Him.
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The Judgment Seat of Christ
For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive what is due him for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad (The Apostle Paul, 2 Corinthians 5:10, NIV).
I work harder and more efficiently when I’m up against a deadline. Deadlines are in fact wonderful things that help me to get in gear. This week I was challenged to think about the ultimate deadline, that day when I will stand before Jesus and give an account of what I’ve done with my life. Wow!, talk about accountability! For every moment, every dollar, every opportunity, and every relationship I will give an account to God.
How much time have I wasted in this life? How often have I put off important things? How often have I obsessed over trivialities while turning away from persons who need me? How many times have I chosen the path of least resistance when the hard path would have yielded far more fruit for eternity? These are tough questions for me to face; it seems like I’m in a perpetual state of repentance for wasting time.
Even the apparent good things I do are often done from motives mixed with self-interest. I’ll happily learn God’s ways of parenting if they help me keep my kids on track. I’ll eagerly embrace God’s principles of finance if they help me get out of debt and become a millionaire so I can be generous. Yet if my confession is only, “God, thanks to your Word, I lived a functional, affluent life in the suburbs.”, how will that fly at the judgment seat of Christ? Will I be confronted with the vital things I left undone because there was no self-interest to motivate me?
Consider the words to this hymn:
His Plan For Me (author unknown)
When I stand at the Judgment Seat of Christ
And He shows His plan for me,
The plan of my life as it might have been
Had He had His way – and I see
How I blocked Him here, and checked Him there,
And I would not yield my will,
Will there be grief in my Savior’s eyes,
Grief though He loves me still?
Would He have me rich and I stand there poor,
Stripped of all but His grace,
While memory runs like a hunted thing,
Down the paths I cannot retrace.
Lord, of the years that are left to me
I give them to Thy hand
Take me and break me and mold me,
To the pattern that Thou hast planned!
Today I choose to live for the glory of God with a view toward the judgment seat of Christ. I rejoice in God’s mercy and forgiveness and draw hope from the knowledge that, on that day, my impure motives and wasted moments will be burned away as chaff and only what was done for Christ will last!
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Nothing Is More Relevant Than Love
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal (Paul the Apostle, 1 Corinthians 13:1, NIV).
Facing evidence of it’s impending demise, the church in North America is scrambling for ways to attract new adherents by becoming more culturally relevant. “We’re not going to reach today’s younger generation by clinging to organizational habits and worship styles that were popular fifty years ago.” is the mantra oft-repeated by proponents of change. I have been sympathetic to this call. I believe that many churches have made an idol out of mid-twentieth century Americana: the church buildings, archaic language, and musical styles of a bygone era. Yet a revival of the church will require far more than trading one idol for another.
Today’s so-called ‘culturally relevant’ churches have offered up a new breed of ‘dude’ pastors with rock-star personas to reverse the decline of the church. They’ve eschewed classroom-based discipleship in favor of personality-driven activism. They’ve traded stained glass for multi-media and surround sound. They have auditoriums instead of sanctuaries, bands instead of choirs, and small groups instead of Sunday school classes. It seems like we’re emulating virtually everything Hollywood does to pack in the crowds and, if numbers are any indicator, it seems to be working in some cases. Yet could our new cultural relevance become a new idol?
What is the church doing to attract people that is different from what the entertainment industry does to attract them? After forty years of active involvement in Baptist churches and over twenty years of service as a pastor, I’ve discovered some things about myself that just might be my personal keys to understanding how we can reverse the decline of the church in North America.
- I’d rather be loved by ordinary people than entertained by superstars.
- I’d rather be annoyed by too much attention than lonely from inattention.
- I’d rather make one new friend that to be surrounded by a multitude of friendly people whose lives are too full for me.
- I’m more interested in being useful than in being comfortable.
- I’d rather be told the painful truth about myself than to be patronized and marginalized until I go away.
Are those who are abandoning the church much different from me? Perhaps the disease afflicting the North American church is not cultural irrelevance; perhaps this is just the symptom. Perhaps our real problem is that we just stopped loving people like we used to. Lord Jesus, have mercy on us!
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Unstoppable Endurance
Here’s a sermon I preached on July 11, 2010 at Wilson Community Church.
7/11/10 Unstoppable Endurance from Wilson Community Church on Vimeo.
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Did God Tell You To Do That?
…stop using this phrase, ‘prophecy from the LORD.’ For people are using it to give authority to their own ideas… (Jeremiah 23:36, NLT).
I often talk with people who yearn for guidance from a Higher Power. Most work hard and live responsible lives. Yet they long to understand the greater purpose for which God created them. They desire honest appraisals of their talents and shortcomings. They seek direction in life’s crucial choices. They crave affirmation; they want to know that they’re on the right path. Theirs is not a self-serving hunger for success. Rather, they aspire to be faithful and useful. They want to please their Creator and add value to the lives of others. Yet they are restless, often questioning, “Could I do more?” or “Should I do something different?”
Sometimes I encounter people who are extraordinarily confident that they are doing exactly what God has destined them to do. Some use unequivocal language such as, “God called me to do this.” Others engage in bold enterprises with no doubt that God will bless their labor. Such people project an assurance that makes others hesitant to question their choices. When they succeed, they claim God’s favor. When they fail, they may re-frame their endeavors or blame others. A few will say simply, “I was wrong.”
Some people bounce from one thing to another, proposing that God is leading them to do this or that, yet never really establishing a consistent trajectory. They want to do what is right yet begin doubting their decisions almost as soon as they make up their mind. People with this mindset entertain grand thoughts about their futures. Typically they do just enough to get by. They end up living under-productive lives.
Our society is ruthless toward the indecisive yet suspicious of the overly self-assured or self-described “God-assured.” We applaud the successful who credit God for the gifts and opportunities they have been afforded. Yet we question those who promote themselves as chosen vessels for the Lord’s work. When the artist touts, “It wasn’t me; it was God!”, we muse, “Man, it was good but it wasn’t that good.”
Have you wondered what life would be like if God just told you what to do with an audible voice? All ambiguity would be erased; we’d have only one decision, to obey or to rebel. Would you be comfortable with that? Do you prefer the ambiguity, some “wiggle room”, so to speak.
While we may not have the advantage of audible directions from God, there are certainly ways we can increase our clarity and confidence when it comes to making life-directing choices. We can start by strengthening our relationships with fellow believers, being honest with them about our struggles, soliciting their observations, and listening. God often speaks through the counsel of the Body of Christ.
The qualities that enable us to live fruitful lives are not developed in isolation. We discover our greatest value, and perhaps our greater purpose, in the context of community. As we observe the lives of people and engage them in meaningful conversations, we nurture our relational intelligence. We listen and become aware of people’s needs, their hopes, and their dreams. We give and discover what adds value to their lives. We develop our skills and learn to better meet their needs. This is the grand experiment: we fail; we succeed; we learn.
My challenge to you today is to seek and to nurture close relationships in a healthy church-community. As people get to know you better, they’ll see your strengths and your shortcomings more clearly. If you listen peaceably to them, you’ll find that they have valuable insights about you to share with you. Hear them and honor their voice as a means through which the Creator speaks to you. Even if you feel you must go against their counsel, you’ll still find value in their warnings. This kind of openness is scary but it is the pathway to clarity, confidence, and humility, qualities that contribute to a healthy, productive life.
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Passion and Purpose
Conventional wisdom suggests that you will not apply extraordinary effort to anything consistently unless you are passionate about it. Your passions are the overriding motivators in your life. If you want to be successful, you should learn to connect everything you do to your core passions.
Passion has several components; I’ll discuss three. First, passion is spiritual. It is breathed into you by your Creator. There is something in each of us that says: “I’m not an accident! I’m not some chance event created by a random assembling of molecules! I have design and purpose! I was born for a reason! The world needs me!”
Secondly, passion is prophetic. As you look this world, you are struck by a sense that something is broken. Something is wrong! Something in this world could be better! The feeling could be profound: assailing grief over abject poverty in sub-Saharan Africa, frustration over lives wasted for lack of opportunity in an urban slum, compassion over the plight of families of chronically ill children. The feeling might seem simple, even self-centered, yet suggest a larger value: “Man, nobody can get a good cheeseburger in this town!”
Thirdly, passion is visionary. It drives you to do something about the thing that is broken. Passion is the feeling that will not let you rest until you do something about it! It is the place to which your thoughts go constantly asking the question, “What can I do?”
It is not unusual for a person to ignore or to suppress her passions. God-given passions often emerge during adolescence, at a time when one is least likely to direct them constructively. Well-meaning parents and counselors may see them as unhealthy obsessions. They might encourage their youth toward more “practical” pursuits. Yet passion, when harnessed, is the foundation of a powerful and productive life.
The key to harnessing your passion is to connect it to a viable purpose. Passion asks the question, “What can I do?” Purpose answers the question, “What can I do?” Purpose factors your personality, talents, training, and experience. Turning your passion into purpose requires focus, discipline, and hard work! It solicits help from others, honest, even brutal feedback, and accountability. This is the narrow path. Those who choose it will find joy because they will make a difference in this world. Those who reject it will become bitter because they will always see the thing that is broken and never acknowledge any responsibility for it.
For discussion: What’s your passion? How will you turn it into purpose?
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Those We Trust and Those We Marginalize
Suppose there was a man who had risen to great power and influence as a result of his compelling vision, extraordinary skills, and fortunate circumstances. He had close to a lifetime of sweat equity vested in his accomplishments. His exploits were heralded in such a way as to conceal the chaff that is inevitably part of all human achievement. He had much to loose if anyone were to expose any weakness or dark side in his character. Such a man would face great temptation to surround himself with raging fans and to marginalize anyone who would threaten to tarnish his impeccable persona.
People who are powerful, successful, and highly regarded can be intimidating. Because of this, the rest of us may hesitate to hold them accountable, especially when we observe them in alleged “minor” offenses. I may have enough chinks in my own armor to make me think twice about confronting flaws I see in someone who has far more credibility and influence than me. Perhaps I fear that such a person could hurt me. Just a casual slight or dismissive comment from him could cause opportunities I might otherwise have had to vaporize. Faced with these fears, I just suck up to “the man”.
When a powerful person falls into sin, it’s not unusual for those who surrounded him to admit that they saw it coming. Little compromises, time and money unaccounted for, and the unexplained departures of previously trusted colleagues all pointed to trouble. Yet the loyal followers chose not to raise questions. For them it must have felt like a lose/lose proposition: “If I’m wrong, I’m humiliated. If I’m right, the gig is up. It’s safer to live in denial.” Yet I wonder how many great people could have been saved from disgrace if their followers had had the courage to hold them accountable.
So what do these observations mean for you?
If you are a leader, don’t be threatened by people who seek to hold you accountable. Don’t be put off by those who ask the hard questions, even if they come across as skeptical. These skeptics are giving you an opportunity to win their trust. They can become your most loyal supporters if you take the time to answer their questions honestly and transparently.
If you’re a loyal supporter, don’t be afraid to ask honest questions of your leaders. Ask with a positive expectation, not a tone of skepticism. A wise leader will take your courage to ask tough questions as an indication that you fully expect reasonable answers. He’ll know that you’re not one to live in denial and will view this as a sign of integrity.
If you’re one who feels like you’ve been marginalized because you’ve expressed concern to a leader, examine your motives. Were you motivated by the best interests of your organization or were you merely seeking to increase your personal power? Were you encouraged when a situation you identified was resolved or were you jealous when the leader heeded your warning yet choose to resolve the problem without your involvement? If you continue to be troubled because your concerns remain chronically unanswered, you should ask yourself the question, “Can I walk away peacefully?” You do have a responsibility to confront and to expose, if necessary, unlawful or immoral behavior of which you are aware. You do not have a right to broadcast every suspicion you might imagine just because your questions have not been answered to your satisfaction. Structures of accountability, especially in large organizations, must be reasonable, lest they place an undue burden on the leaders. You don’t necessarily have a right to know everything.
Finding cohorts and leaders with whom you can build a high level of trust is not easy. First you must trust God; believing that He will protect you even if you get burned. Secondly, you must risk being authentic. Don’t reinvent yourself for the purpose of impressing a leader or fitting into a group. The best way to find your people is to be yourself. Third, you must take some risk by anteing trust to your cohorts, exercising patience, and letting trust grow. Trust grows at different rates for different people. Forth, you must forgive.
I’ve been asking myself these hard questions lately: Do I trust God? Do I trust Him enough to protect every opportunity to which He has called me? Am I willing to accept cheerfully the opportunities He gives me? Do I believe that my fate lies in God’s hands and not in human hands? Am I comfortable with the idea that God’s plans for me might involve suffering? Am I willing to hold others accountable, no matter how powerful or influential they might be? Am I willing to be an authentic person even if it means being marginalized by those in power? Am I willing to repent when I’m wrong? Am I willing to take responsibility when my failures are exposed?
Lord, please give me the courage to be all that you created and saved me to be!
For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you. 4Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, 5so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. 6We have different gifts, according to the grace given us. If a man’s gift is prophesying, let him use it in proportion to his[b]faith. 7If it is serving, let him serve; if it is teaching, let him teach; 8if it is encouraging, let him encourage; if it is contributing to the needs of others, let him give generously; if it is leadership, let him govern diligently; if it is showing mercy, let him do it cheerfully (Romans 12:3-8, NIV).
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Clean Freak/Neat Freak
OK, so I saw this on Craig’s List.
“So, this furniture isn’t even a year old yet, no dings, no scratches, nothing on them, *I’m a bit of a clean freak/neat freak when it comes to my things* I bought this set for over $4,000…”
This is the actual picture–a TOTAL “clean freak/neat freak”, wouldn’t you say?
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Your Value Changes As You Age (Part 2)
I meet weekly with a group of men, most of whom are young, in their 20s and 30s. One of them told me that he liked having an older guy (older guy? aahhhhh!) in the group because of the wisdom that I bring to the table. Wisdom?, I thought. I remember having far more wisdom when I was thirty years old. People used to tell me that I was wise for my age. Looking back, good results that came from my decisions, results that I then attributed to my wisdom, now just seem like dumb luck and/or the grace of God carrying me through this life. This week I commented to a group of older men (most of whom are actually older than me) that I felt like I didn’t know anything anymore. Almost in chorus the men chimed, “That’s wisdom!”
As a young man I was thoroughly infatuated with my vision for life. I was driven to achieve and to produce. I believed that my achievements would validate my life. I learned to be articulate and persuasive, to be passionate about my vision and to infect others with that passion. Yet I was egocentric. I tried to love people but my thoughts always came back to me. I tried to listen to people but my mind always drifted toward the things that I wanted to get done. As I’ve entered midlife, I’ve begun to grieve over these tendencies because I know that I’ve hurt a lot of people by being this way.
Today I’m just trying to learn to love. I feel like I understand for the first time what Paul meant when he said, “If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal” (I Corinthians 13:1, NIV).
Perhaps the key to loving the person in front of you is letting go of the vision that is driving you. A friend recently told me that the way to love is to live in the present, not in the future. This is hard for someone who’s a Myers-Briggs “N” off the chart. Yet Jesus did say “do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself” (Matthew 6:34, NIV). I guess I’m just starting to get this one too.
I still have vision but I try to yield it to God every day. If the vision truly is from God, He will bring it to pass as I live today, just as He did with Joseph. Jesus’ yoke is easy. Obsessing over the future just makes it seem harder.
So what do older guys have to offer? Perhaps it is just more experiences to confirm what we must acknowledge from the very start. It’s all grace, man!
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